Monday, May 31, 2010

so here you go

SO i got it up on youtube

But here it is. still a lot of work needed on lighting will have to just remember when (IF) I make another one to have better lighting because the editing did not do enough. Also not sure it was good quality once I moved it over in quick time (exporting ha meh)


I let it try to upload for about 15 mins and lost patience after all I have done today.
Tips on uploading vids here??

Please check out my youtube link

Thanks :D

apple...yeh ftw

So I bought an Ipod after well years of NOT for the main fact that I dislike apple and usually get pretty pissy when I Have to use anything that has to do with it. HOWEVER, my sad little dinky mp3 player was not cutting it and I wanted one that could hold OODLES so yeh I gave in. Plus where I bought it from had a sale/combo thing so I could use it with my car. SO YEh.

NOW what I did not know when I bought it was that I could make videos. SO when I found that out I was wowed and thrilled since neither one of my cameras can make a video, because they lack the time, unless i was to buy an SD card, which yeh one day I will but anyhow. SO again I was like yay I can make the video I want to make.

UM so 5 hours later from making the video...downloading about 5 different non itunes programs because YOU CAN NOT get your video off of your ipod with itunes (cough hate apple) SO yes it took me a lot of programs before one would REALLY DO IT! SO then I got it and wanted to fix the color because I did not have enough light! WELLL can not do that with any of the programs I do have, I have quicktime but it is not I freaking bought pro, it was not too expensive so I was ok with that. SIMPLE I am thinking this will be. (with apple yeh right)

So I touched it up and saved it and tried to upload it to youtube and what do they tell me, I can not because I have to change certain thing. So after much googling and trying to get exporting videos right I THINK I figured it out!!!!!!!! haha NO because it would not export it just got stuck at 27% well wtf that was an hour or so wasted trying to get it to work and fiddling with settings still no workie so ffs.

SO I finally googled some more lol (god bless google I guess) I found some this and that info about stuff that I can by no way explain to you lol SO I fiddled with settings some more. CHANGED the settings from HD (high definition, ffs who cares its youtube and me) and I GOT IT TO EXPORT....and some how unclicked the sound setting SO I HAD NO sound lol (yeh that was me, not apple but still I will blame apple right now!!) SO I tried it again and it worked and I am right now watching the video again and wanting to upload it to you guys too and wondering how that will go! lol SO let us hope I can get it onto youtube and here. sheesh

bless me!!!

Happy Memorial Day

Well I have been loads busy since I got off work yesterday. I got lots done on my "Teesha Moore" journal. I am loving it. I am trying to just enjoy it and not rush through it to get to done. Which sometimes can happen when I want the end result! But that is not the point of it so I AM TRYING. :)

I am half way through my second ROD which is for my best friend for Christmas. Which i hope I can hold onto till then because I have a feeling I will be all done with and be like I wanna give it to you now!

I also got my first block from my 3x6 bee. I still have to post all mine out this week. I tried last week, but while i was out the electricity went out in the whole town so the post would not post anything, lol.

Not much else going on. Going to try and get some items up on my etsy store this week. I am de-stashing. I really want to do a give away but it is hard to get organized!

SO on that as I sit here and watch too many videos on your tube :P I am off to create...and do laundry!

Monday, May 24, 2010


I finished my fist RODs journal! I am super excited. I have some pictures of the outside and inside before finish and after for the outside. But I want to make a video for the inside so you can see all the pages, BUT my camera does short videos lol. SO I am going to get all this pictures off and try and do it later. If not I may try and use my web cam, but it is built into the front of the laptop, so weird angle and you would see me :S scary stuff lol

SO here are a few pics :D

I did very little free or any other kind of quilting on the front. It really is very simple. I will do more on the next one maybe. :D I like this one as is a lot!

closed, tied with signatures sewn in :D

and here we have it closed, tied back view, and that little black moon strip is a piece I sewed to one of the signatures, like a bookmark placement :D
I can not wait to start journaling in it. :D I had thought to make it more clean by snipping all the threads, but I am going to go with it for now and see how it goes for. I can always go back later.

I have never claimed to be an artist although here in my 30's I am starting to believe I really am. A new one I am sure, I have indeed so much to learn! Anyway. I have been journaling since I can remember, since I always knew I would be a writer, how time changes things, lol. Still a writer indeed but yeh. :P But I never thought of myself as an "artists" so I never really did more than just journal my feelings in a simple composition notebook, line by line. However, I have always drooled over those art journals with all the visual aspects and how talented people are with there drawing abilities, which I lack (did I mention my brother is an amazing artist, as in pen and ink, paint etc, e me i Just have a sewing machine right? lol) SO needless to say eh I never really let me self go there, scared, for sure!

Scared now, NO WAY..well still scared but determined. BECAUSE, I am an artist and I have so many things I want to share and learn! SO that has brought me to the point where I have SPENT way too much money on art paper, pens, paint etc lol. BUT I am sure the outcome will be worth it. I also think it will do enormous amounts for how I have been so stressed with my day to day pay the bills job, etc.

SO YES I have become obsessed with art journals. There are TONS Of videos on youtube, some awesome people sharing there ideas and such. Very cool. YOu know I have been working on RODs, which I should complete my first one this week. SADLY, I broke the machine I was using to sew all my paper. I DID NOT want to use my machines I sew with for quilting and etc, just did not want to do that. SO I had an old Singer Millennium series??? NO idea I got it like 11ish years ago. My best friend had been using when she sewed, like twice lol :P SO I got it back from her a few years ago ad just pulled it out and dusted it. It has done great with all the little sewing the papers and etc but when I went to sew the signatures together, it was just too much to handle, so it did one but crapped out on the second. SO I am pretty sure, one it was way dirty, had not been oiled in well 11 years lol so it is amazing it lasted for a short bit. SO I pulled it apart a bit in the hopes to salvage it, but nah it was not happening. I may run to the store where I bought my last machine and see what they say,but again I do not really like the machine anyway so maybe they will give me like 25 bucks for a trade in or something lol. LIKE I need another machine lol. But with some work the machine would still be usable so maybe a new sewer on a budget can use it. i hate for it to just sit around here. HOWEVER, I also do not want to spend over 100 bucks on a machine that will just be used for sewing papers??? SO not sure if I will just go to Wal MArt and get something under 100 bucks which will be fine, but also I want to make sure this machine goes out of my house so I still have to go to the machine store. AND well the can talk me into stuff easy eh lol :P
OK Long text post there so lemme find you some kind of picture for now. I have lots I have to take but I have to re-charge the batteries. OH BTW I am getting a new camera in the mail soon. I bought a nikon coolpix, so I can carry it around in my purse. The one I use now just is not that slim so. I am excited about that as well. :) I also bought an ipod...don't tell my husband lol :)

My brother drew this for a contest for the fire peoples, he drew 2 but here is just one. I do not remember if it was for new badge thingies or for something they were going to paint on their building :S bad memory lol

Saturday, May 22, 2010


Nightmares are disturbing dreams associated with anxiety, fear or terror. Nightmares are common. (really...)

Nightmares are parasomnias — undesirable experiences that occur during sleep. You've had a nightmare if:
Your dream wakes you up (yup)
You feel scared, anxious, angry, sad or disgusted as a result of your dream (yup)
You can think clearly upon awakening, and can recall details of your dream (yup)
Your dream occurs near the end of your sleep time (I woke up so I guess my sleep time ended huh??)
Your dream keeps you from falling back to sleep easily (indeed)

Occasional nightmares usually aren't a concern, but regularly disrupted sleep can be. It can cause excessive daytime sleepiness, which can lead to difficulties at school or work, or problems with everyday tasks such as driving. (sigh)

Now I have alway shad nightmares throughout my life. Yes stress I guess etc, whatever. However, in the last two months I have had them back to back and I wake up after each one, having many. Where I have been waking up about every hour, where I use to only wake up every 2 hours...yeh sad either way. So put that on top of how dizzy I have been, stressed, tired because of this new BP medicine....I mean all of it together. BLEH!

So yeh I sure hate to go to my DR with something else. I think I will give it a few more weeks and see if maybe I get back to a more normal routine of only a few nightmares and wake up every 2 hours. I am hoping since I am starting to feel a bit better that maybe I will return sort of to a normalness. Which by the way, is really far from normal at all. But that is that!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

My new bag :D

Well I have still not been feeling well, I am still having dizzy episodes and just weirdness. I am pretty worried about it and no idea what to do, really. I have no idea what might really be causing it. It really makes it hard for me to do anythng for more than 30 minutes. ANYTHING. Like typing this right now lol :S But I am trying to just push through since I can not do much else about it! I have been having a fairly hard time sewing and focusing really on anything BUT I have got a few things done, more than I thought I would really.

First here is the bag I made from the pattern I won from Clover & Violet.

Here is my all time fav love love superman bag. Time is catching up to it. I do hope my bag can keep up...

Also I signed up for this online class from Mary Ann Moss, ROD Journals. I LOVE IT! :D I am so glad I did this. I have already finished my cover and am collecting things for my signatures (pages for the inside) :D I will keep you updated on this indeed. I plan on making a few for Christmas gifts for those that I know will love journaling as well, and having something with a serious touch added just for them.

Here is my inspiration piece for m first one, which will be for me. I have a good bit done already but will leave that for next time. :D

Be Blessed All!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

I won!

I know I am so excited. Over at Clover & Violet they were having a giveaway! :) I kept checking back and they had not announced them, then they added a week to it. Then with me feeling like poo and this medicine has completely wiped me out,I forgot to check back. BUT thankfully I found my post note reminding me when I was sorting bills and went and check and I WAS A WINNER!!!!!!!!! Exciting! So I won my choice of a pattern and I chose the Jane Bag pattern. And I am excited major because I have been telling myself I need a new purse, the one I have now s my all time fav, yes I made it, I will have to take a picture and post it one day. But the handle is slowly wearing away, so I have been saying I need to make another something BUT what. Well here is the answer. SO I am off to pick fabrics! :D Thanks ladies!

Monday, May 10, 2010

Just because...

I did not spend the beginning years changing diapers.
I did not spend time potty training.
I did not get to see them off to their first day at school.
I did not get to give them a big brother or sister(yet!).
I did not get to help them with their homework.

Or send them off to highschool.
See them get their first touchdown, or award!

I did not get to usher them off to prom sadly, taking too many pictures! :D
I did not get to teach them to drive or see them graduate.

And then see them so proudly grow into a young man or woman and marry
and have their very own bundles of joy.

Just because I did not get the gift of doing any of these things
DOES NOT mean I am not a mother just like you.

To all the mothers who have lost a loved child before their time to blossom into beautiful people!
To all of us who share this heartache. And to all of those who think we are not mothers, or fathers, I do not know what to tell you but that you are indeed wrong! And I hope one day you become a better person on that end.

You are my tiny angel that has grown up in a wonderful haven my son.

Zachary Wayne Tillman
October 20, 1998 - October 20, 1998

How the time has gone by and I do miss you so, but I know you watch over me daily and ofr that and you I am ever so grateful!

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Happy Mothers Day! :D

Here is the wonderful roses my best friend of........(omg I am counting)....14 years, plus a few where we were friends but not best best like we are now! SO the years go by. She is amazing, awesome and such a wonderful mother as well as person! We have weathered so much and for that and her I am so thankful!

Friday, May 7, 2010

not myself

Since my ER visit early Sunday morning I have not been myself at all! I have felt like diong nothing and have been very tired and dizzy and just well not me at all!

I open my sewing room door look at it and then close it right back :( sad but that is how it has been this past week. I do feel I have wasted lost days but that is just how it was.

i am hoping that when Monday gets here and my work week is done and I have 2 days off I will feel better and be more me. I can not promise much htough at this point lol

I am still having dizzy spells and a bit tired but I have been doing ok at work and the new BP medicine I am on is not making me feel super horrible at all like that last one had.

So that seems to be it. OH WAIT other than feeling fairly poopie and work being super crazy as always. My beautiful and amasing best friend sent me a dozen roses for mothers day and just to say she loved me! Made my day. I got them wehn I got up today to go into work. Total surprise and so sweet and awesome of her. I have only taken a pic of my phone so far and will try and take one which will be better in the am when I get home so I can share :DDDD

I am thankful to be so loved and have so much greatness all of which I need to be better at motivating myself so I can shareit will so many others.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

The evil ER

Ok I guess it is not exactly evil but still. Five hundred bucks later for a lame diagnosis well I have to call it something!

So I had a major dizzy spell and almost passed out in a patients room. SO thankfully there was at least one person who was helpful and then I had to get my dad to come pick me up and his driving scares me and it was during all this flood mess :S So then my husband took me to the ER, yay at 4 am!

Which btw it is sad, yes I know we have many sick patients and they are way sicker then me etc, however it is indeed sad when you work at a hospital and no one cares if you really feel that bad and do not really want to help you! EH all I am saying. It has beea hell of a week anyway, but I was acutally havig a quiut good night, we all were, so why did I then get all whacked out I have no idea.

So to say I felt super bad, I have not been to an ER in about 11 yeas. YEH crazy. I remember why now lol. So attacked my nurses lol like 4 at a time, a EKG, a bad job at drawing my blood, twice, and hooking me up to the stupid blood pressure monitor, ALL OF THEM AT THE SAME TIME lol overkill. Then off to CT, which btw this is the first time I have ever had either an EKG or a CT Yeh fun. SO then does the Dr ever say anything about either the EKG or CT OF COURSE NOT! That would be so stupid and such a waste of his time. I have no idea why I still work in medical but anyway! Bleh SO yeh 500 bucks later, and a diagnosis of dizziness and giddiness here I am, feeling like shit and not GIDDY AT ALL!!! (sigh)

oh well